No pressure!

A week before my new cabaret show "Unbreak My Heart" opens in the Cabaret Fringe, I receive an invitation to sing at the Festival Centre Piano Bar.  This will be the opening night of the Cabaret Festival, the larger, mainstream festival featuring big-name international acts.  

At the end of the gala opening of the Festival, the audience will spill out into the Piano Bar for champagne and entertainment - including me.  No pressure!

It is going to be a Brazilian "open-mic" session, with guitar and percussion accompaniment.  The invitation comes from Charmaine, a professional jazz diva who performs in a duo with guitarist Mike (who will be accompanying us).  I feel honoured to be invited and immediately accept.

My instructions are "Arrive at 9.20 pm, with charts, ready to go".  There will be no rehearsal.

At home before this event, I assemble my music.  I feel confused and conflicted.  There are so many songs to choose from.  Should I select easy, well-known songs?  What if we all choose the same song?  I might end up having to sing something I'm not so familiar with.  But if I choose something too obscure, it might make things difficult for the musicians.  Plus, every piece of sheet music seems to have something a bit wrong with it.  Many songs are in the wrong key - my accompanists have transposed by sight as they played, or they made their own notations.  I can't go there expecting Mike to work out a new key in front of an audience.  He could probably do this, but it would not be fair to impose it on him.  Some songs are in the right key but I haven't sung them for ages, and I might forget the words.  I don't want to sing with lyrics on a music stand in front of me.  Some songs seem perfect, but it's piano music; sheets taped together into a strip about a metre long.  That won't work for a guitarist.

The bottom line is that I don't have any "charts".  I've mainly worked with pianists, and they play from sheet music - "dots".  Guitarists like to play from "charts" or "tab", showing only the chord notations.  I pick out several pieces of sheet music that condense the song into one or two pages, in keys that I can sing.  They are not perfect, but they'll have to do.  I shove all the Bossa music books into a carry-bag and take them along too, just in case they are needed.

I arrive on time, but the place is already full of cabaret patrons - flamboyantly dressed, milling about, chatting animatedly, buying flutes of champagne.  There are some big-name artists in the room, including the festival Director.  No pressure!

Various friends spot me in the crowd and keep me company for a while.  The room is noisy and as I raise my voice to be heard over the rabble I can feel my throat straining.

Charmaine, Mike and Fabian (the percussionist) take to the stage.  They produce some wonderful music.  Charmaine's vocals soar and she improvises brilliantly. Then it's time for the guest performers.  I'm the second one to be called up.  I step up onto the stage, have a brief discussion with the musicians and show them my music.  We choose the first song.  It's one that Mike and I performed together about two years ago.  Then I take my seat in the armchair alongside them.

I pick up the microphone for the first time - I have no idea how I'll sound in this room.  It is quite a big open space, and my first few notes are too quiet.  I'm not used to singing sitting down.  I can't get my breathing going; can't make my voice work the way it should.  But as we progress through the song my confidence builds.  During the instrumental break I count the bars carefully, so I'll know when to come back in.  Now I'm singing better.  We move into the second song.  Part-way through I decide to stand up.  Now I'm breathing more deeply and I sound much better.  Overall, my performance is passable.

Stepping off stage, three women invite me to join them at their table.  I relax and have a glass of champagne and we chat a little.  More friends emerge from the crowd and congratulate me.  The rest of the show is wonderful, with fantastic singers and some complex arrangements.  I'm just happy to be a part of it.

A week later we do the same show again.  I bring the same two songs (no point reinventing the wheel), and also bring along my Brazilian percussion instruments.  This time, I choose to stand for my entire performance.  My first couple of lines are not smooth as I would like, but when I focus on my breathing the tone sounds a lot nicer.  Charmaine plays piano and adds an improvised section, then we harmonise together.  A lady in the front row wields my shaker happily.  We bring the second song to a close, and I'm done.

Much as I would have liked to rehearse my songs beforehand, I can see how time-consuming it would have been to give everyone that opportunity.  I'm pleased that I was able to remain calm and keep my wits about me.

It's good to test yourself in different situations.  Under pressure.