I return home from my trip. I'm jet-lagged and tired, and the fatigue opens a gap which permits self-doubt to creep in.
What am I doing? Am I just wasting my skills? I could be working as a serious lawyer. Am I being a "dilettante"? Am I even good enough?
I feel I've come to a halt. I have no idea how to get moving again.
I register for the Cabaret Fringe Festival. This will force me to create a show.
My singing teacher invites me to attend a Saturday morning singing class, based on a new method that he thinks is interesting. It's a half-day and it's cheap. I decided to go along, even though that means missing my Portuguese language lesson; I message the teacher to let her know I won't be in class that day.
The session is pretty theoretical; it's all about vocal anatomy and how you can control bits of it to various effects. It's quite interesting but there's not much in practical terms that I can take away and use. I would have liked to hear somebody sing, but the only singing we did was in a group. But this session is a promotion for a week-long singing program that is coming up soon.
Is this what I need next? Well, an intensive week of singing could be therapeutic. It would give a huge boost to my skills and confidence. My diary for that week is blank. The fee is reasonable. There is no reason not to do it. I've come this far; what's another week?
I take a flyer and read about the presenter. She was part of a group that was very successful. I never went to see them (too busy being a lawyer), but instantly I recognize the name. She's a cabaret performer; a woman after my own heart.
As soon as I get home I go online and register for the course.
I also check my email, and there's a message from Eneias' visa agent, forwarding information from Australian Immigration. OK, it's just a process; I will work through it. Apparently it takes 2-3 months. If only I'd known about this earlier, I could have got it through in time. The thought is maddening, and I have to let it go.
I have to keep going. I've told everyone what I plan to do, and they're all expecting a show. Declaring your goals is a great way to make you accountable for them. At the conference in Vienna I told the story as part of a piece about building relationships internationally, and I've had lots of messages of encouragement.
Right now, I'm being tested.
Now is not the time to give up.
Watch my conference presentation in Vienna
What am I doing? Am I just wasting my skills? I could be working as a serious lawyer. Am I being a "dilettante"? Am I even good enough?
I feel I've come to a halt. I have no idea how to get moving again.
I register for the Cabaret Fringe Festival. This will force me to create a show.
My singing teacher invites me to attend a Saturday morning singing class, based on a new method that he thinks is interesting. It's a half-day and it's cheap. I decided to go along, even though that means missing my Portuguese language lesson; I message the teacher to let her know I won't be in class that day.
The session is pretty theoretical; it's all about vocal anatomy and how you can control bits of it to various effects. It's quite interesting but there's not much in practical terms that I can take away and use. I would have liked to hear somebody sing, but the only singing we did was in a group. But this session is a promotion for a week-long singing program that is coming up soon.
Is this what I need next? Well, an intensive week of singing could be therapeutic. It would give a huge boost to my skills and confidence. My diary for that week is blank. The fee is reasonable. There is no reason not to do it. I've come this far; what's another week?
I take a flyer and read about the presenter. She was part of a group that was very successful. I never went to see them (too busy being a lawyer), but instantly I recognize the name. She's a cabaret performer; a woman after my own heart.
As soon as I get home I go online and register for the course.
I also check my email, and there's a message from Eneias' visa agent, forwarding information from Australian Immigration. OK, it's just a process; I will work through it. Apparently it takes 2-3 months. If only I'd known about this earlier, I could have got it through in time. The thought is maddening, and I have to let it go.
I have to keep going. I've told everyone what I plan to do, and they're all expecting a show. Declaring your goals is a great way to make you accountable for them. At the conference in Vienna I told the story as part of a piece about building relationships internationally, and I've had lots of messages of encouragement.
Right now, I'm being tested.
Now is not the time to give up.
Watch my conference presentation in Vienna
No comments:
Post a Comment